“In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives. Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They put their trust in God and accepted the authority of their husbands. For instance, Sarah obeyed her husband, Abraham, and called him her master. You are her daughters when you do what is right without fear of what your husbands might do. In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered. Finally, all of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude. Don’t repay evil for evil. Don’t retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God has called you to do, and he will grant you his blessing. For the Scriptures say, “If you want to enjoy life and see many happy days, keep your tongue from speaking evil and your lips from telling lies. Turn away from evil and do good. Search for peace, and work to maintain it. The eyes of the Lord watch over those who do right, and his ears are open to their prayers. But the Lord turns his face against those who do evil.”
We see 2 hot topics in these verses: submission and modesty.
So let’s dive into them:
Submission:
Men and women are equal… but you are still called to submit to your husband! Yes, husbands are called to lead, but they’re called to lead the way Christ leads—by serving. Husbands are instructed to love their wives as Christ loves the Church. Christlike leadership is selfless, sacrificial, and service-oriented, not domineering or aggressive (Eph 5:23).
Listen, your husband isn’t perfect, but your hope for a better marriage doesn’t rest on him becoming perfect. Instead, your hope is in Christ, who sustains and sanctifies both of you.
Wives, as you love and respect your husband, he will see Christ through you, and this will help him love you more like Christ does. That’s what 1 Peter 3 is talking about!
Marriage is bigger than the two of you. It’s a picture of Christ and the Church, meant to showcase Christ’s love to the world! Our submission as wives is simply a part of this beautiful imagery. Life isn’t about you; life is about Jesus.
Modesty:
"Don’t be concerned about outward beauty... clothe yourself with beauty that comes from within." It’s not a sin to do your hair or wear makeup, but the reason behind it matters. Are you seeking validation from others or craving attention? Modesty is about the heart, not just clothing. As Christians, modesty should permeate our entire lives—from how we speak to how we interact with others. Our lives revolve around magnifying Christ, and our purpose is to display Him to the world.
We dress modestly because we prioritize showing Christ to others over showcasing ourselves. Does this mean you should remain insecure or not strive for confidence? Absolutely not! However, seeking attention from others will never truly satisfy you. God’s Word makes it clear that we are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). Being made in God’s image means we are precious in His sight. Our confidence should rest in this truth—not in our outward appearance, not in perfectly symmetrical features or the trendiest outfits, but in the person and work of Jesus.
Whether you "adorn yourself" with the best hair extensions, a brand-new outfit, or the latest TikTok trend, remember that the most important beauty starts within—and that’s the kind of confidence that lasts.
Modesty and submission both stem from a heart that seeks to reflect Christ. Modesty is about living in a way that points others to God rather than seeking attention, and submission in marriage is about honoring God’s design and showing the gospel through our marriages. Both are about our lives being all about Him!
Questions: